


Red Ocean

by adamngoodbatch (sibbed)



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: 911CrackWeek2020, 911crackweek, Angst, Character Death In Dream, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Crangst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt Evan "Buck" Buckley, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sleep Paralysis, dream - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-24
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:20:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27697529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sibbed/pseuds/adamngoodbatch
Summary: He searches for the remote and finds it under a cushion. He presses play and the next episode starts playing.Freefall.Oh, god, he remembers this one. It’s the one where Romano dies crushed by his mortal enemy... a fucking helicopter.How fitting.He fights to stay awake and watch the episode, but eventually, his eyelids win the battle and he falls asleep again.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan “Buck” Buckley & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 94





	Red Ocean

**Author's Note:**

> 911 Crack week Day 1: Crangst
> 
> This fic came to life out of nowhere when my brain decided to make a parallel between Buck and Robert Romano and his mortal enemy, the helicopter
> 
> Who knows what's what  
> But that's what crack week is all about, huh?

Watching ER for 9 hours in a row proves not to be the best decision Buck’s ever made. The sadness that Ali walking away has instilled is invading every space in his life.

No one stays. Everybody leaves.

Buck pops two pills in his mouth and drifts off on his couch with his broken leg perched up high over a cushion. Sleep comes easier than the night before, his mind getting fuzzier by the minute while another episode of ER plays on his TV.

He wakes up with a start two hours later. His leg throbbing in pain and pins and needles on his foot. He props himself up as best he can and reaches for the glass of water he left for himself on the table and notices the pills beside it. The clock says it isn’t time for a new dose of painkillers, but his leg is telling him otherwise. He takes a pill and then another one and feels them scrape the walls of his esophagus on the way down. The bitter taste they leave in his mouth is just as horrible as always. He coughs and throws himself back on the couch with a sigh.

He searches for the remote and finds it under a cushion. He presses play and the next episode starts playing.

Freefall. 

Oh, god, he remembers this one. It’s the one where Romano dies crushed by his mortal enemy... a fucking helicopter. 

How fitting.

He fights to stay awake and watch the episode, but eventually, his eyelids win the battle and he falls asleep again.

* * *

_Pavement scrapes harshly on his face._

_The air is cold and he tastes iron in his mouth. His head is throbbing, but he forces his eyes to stay open. He blinks repeatedly as he realizes his hands are over the pavement too._

_He tries to stand up, to run away, to save himself, but his legs are not moving._

_He turns to look at the sky and there’s a red light coming closer and closer and closer at very high speed._

_His heart beats rapidly as the light approaches him._

_But it’s not. It’s not a light._

_It’s an object. Steel and red shining bright against the night sky._

_It’s the ladder truck._

_And it’s coming for him._

_As it courses through the sky, Buck’s breath catches in his lungs._

_The ladder truck plummets to the ground and falls right on top of Buck._

_The last thing he remembers it’s the sting in his lungs as he gasps for air._

_As if he was about to take a final swim in an infinite red ocean._

* * *

He blinks awake.

There’s an oppressive force on his chest, pinning him down and Buck feels like he’s drowning. Water filling his lungs. He gasps for air, but he only manages a timid inhale. He tries to sit straight, but he can’t. He tries to push that invisible force away from his chest, but his arms won’t move.

He gasps, desperate to move.

A horn blasts through his loft and a collection of intrusive shadows blur his vision. He’s about to surrender himself to the red ocean that envelops him when a tender touch to his shoulder brings him out of his stupor.

He blinks.

“Buck.”

He knows that soothing voice. He opens his eyes and blinks, again and again, trying to focus. A pair of brown eyes stare at him and he fixes his thoughts on those eyes.

“Buck, it’s okay. Breathe, come on.”

Buck exhales and his lungs sting.

“You were having a nightmare.”

That voice is going to save his life, Buck knows this. That voice has already saved his life so many times before.

Buck takes a deep breath and tries to move again, but instead, he can feel his body tremble from head to toe.

“Oh. Okay.” 

That voice knows him so well, it’s embarrassing.

“Is it the first time you have a sleep paralysis episode?”

Buck tries to nod.

“Listen to my voice, you are awake and I am here. Your body is just taking a bit to catch up with your brain, okay?”

Buck nods, and this time he feels his head moving.

“There you go. Now, breathe in again and try and squeeze my hand.”

Buck hadn’t noticed before there was a hand holding on to his own. He squeezes and the hand squeezes back.

“Excellent. Now breathe again.”

Buck does, he obeys every single step of the way until he finds himself able to move again.

“Welcome back.”

“Thanks, Eddie,” Buck responds with a shaky voice, throwing himself on the cushion behind him. Eddie’s steadying hand still a secure weight on Buck’s shoulder and his voice the guiding light to stay here, in the present.

“Drink some water,” Eddie demands as he pushes the glass of water into Buck’s shaky hands. He trails the movement of the glass in Buck’s hands until he manages to take the first sip of water. “There you go.”

“I’m exhausted.”

“You’re healing, it’s a process.”

“Yes, but-”

“No. There are no buts. You need to let your body do its work.”

Buck groans and tries to sit up. “I know.”

“I’ll be here. Bobby will be here. Hen, Chim… Maddie. We’re all here for you.” Eddie shifts on his seat.

“I know.” It’s true. He does know, they’ve been right beside him and they are not going to go away. Buck takes a deep breath and looks at Eddie. “I know,” he repeats himself, knowingly.

“Then rest,” Eddie commands, grabbing Buck from his shoulder again and driving him back down into the cushions. He switches places and helps Buck lay down and prop his leg up on his lap. “I’ll be here.”

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!  
> Kudos and comments feed my soul!


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